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    The Narc’s Flying Monkeys

    Jokes about the Narcissist's flying monkeys

    In the context of narcissistic abuse, “flying monkeys” refer to the people who the narcissist manipulates into helping them carry out their schemes and further their agenda. These enablers act on behalf of the narcissist, often unknowingly, by spreading rumors, spying, or even directly harassing the narcissist’s target. They essentially “fly” to do the narcissist’s dirty work, much like the flying monkeys in “The Wizard of Oz.”

    I’ll Get You My Pretty and Your Little Dog too

    Why do narcissists need flying monkeys? Because doing all that backstabbing alone would be too much work!

    What’s the narc’s secret to winning people over? A charming smile, a convincing story, and an audience that loves a good drama and don’t really care about what’s true.

    How does this lying puke-face appear so calm and composed while you’re a hot mess? He’s got the whole ‘I’m a saint, and she’s crazy’ act down to a science, while you’re a screaming ball of tears and frustration.

    Why agree with the narcissist? Because, integrity is so overrated.

    Why do people think he is just a mellow guy trying his best? Because when he spins his web of lies, he’s as cool as a cucumber, and you’re an emotional, chaotic mess who can’t catch a break.

    Why do his friends hate you so much? He’s painted you as the villain in his never-ending drama, and they’ve all bought into his bullshit.

    How do you know you’ve been dealing with this shit for too long? When someone you’ve never met starts giving you the stink eye, and deep down you know he’s been talking shit.”

    Why do some people always defend the narc? They must think that backing a delusional tyrant is a shortcut to enlightenment.

    Why do some people believe lies about you without question? Cuz he’s got the gift of gab and is really good at talking to people, also he triggers you at just the right moments so you end up looking like the crazy bitch he says you are.

    What’s the narcissist’s trick for turning people against you? To some, he’s a martyr; to others, he’s a victim of your supposed madness, and to a few, he’s just a messenger passing along dirty gossip.

    Why does the narcissist have so many people convinced you’re the problem? Because he’s playing every angle, from the sympathetic hero to the poor victim, while you’re stuck trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered reality.

    Why do people pity and praise the liar? He’s got the “I tried so hard, but she’s beyond help” narrative down so well, and meanwhile you are at your worst cuz of this asshole, you actually do look a bit on the crazy side.

    Why do some think you’re a worthless, selfish bitch? Because they only know what he tells them, and he’s made sure to fill it with enough venom to keep them hooked.

    Why did the narcissist cross the road? He spotted someone who might still think well of you… not any more.

    Why do some people act like they don’t even know you? Cuz the snake has been talking so much shit that they’re too scared to get to know the real you.

    The narc’s been telling anyone willing to listen I’m a ‘dirty whore and a thief’?
    No wonder these guys I don’t even know are being assholes to me.

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