Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because it ran out of juice!
What do you call a sad grape? A blueberry.
Why are grapes never lonely? Because they come in bunches!
What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the grape stop arguing? It didn’t want to get in a jam.
How do you make a grape laugh? Tickle its vine!
What do you call a grape dressed as a superhero? A vine crusader!
Why was the grape so flexible? It did yoga to improve its vine-ability.
What’s a grape’s favorite state? Grapevine, Texas!
Why did the grape give up playing sports? It kept getting squashed.
How do grapes send messages? Through vine mail!
Why don’t grapes make good detectives? They always wine about the evidence.
What happens when you step on a grape? It gives a little wine.
Why did the grape go out with a prune? Because it couldn’t find a date!
What do you call a grape that’s a philosopher? A deep thinker.
Why are grapes never unemployed? They’re always raisin’ to the occasion.
What’s a grape’s favorite kind of music? R&B – Raisins & Blues!
How do grapes break up with each other? “It’s not you, it’s me. I need to wine down.”
Why did the grape refuse to fight? It didn’t want to get in a sour situation.
What’s a grape’s favorite board game? Vine-opoly!
Slogans For Grape Lovers
“Grapes: because adulting needs wine.”
“I’m just here for the vine times.”
“Life’s too short for bad wine or sour grapes.”
“Squeeze the day.”
“Peeling fine with my wine.”
“In a serious relation-grape.”
“Grapes: The original sour patch kids.”
“Keep calm and grape on.”
“Not all heroes wear capes. Some just bring grapes.”
“I heard it through the grapevine that I’m pretty great.”
“Wine a bit, you’ll feel better.”
“Let’s get ready to stumble (grape edition).”
“Eat, sleep, wine, repeat.”
“Who needs therapy when you’ve got grapes?”
“Grapes: because wine not?”
“This is my grape crushing shirt.”
“I make grape decisions.”
“You had me at merlot.”
“Grape lovers do it on the vine.”
“Life is full of tough choices. Grapes aren’t one of them.”